There are days when I feel I could leap tall buildings in a single bound. This isn't one.
Got to swim. No point going to a heated pool. Channel isn't heated. Check Twitter @brockwellLido "Wednesday's rainy Lido pool temp is 13.7 degrees" - 3 degrees cooler than the channel will be. Urgh. Surely it's got to get warmer soon? Soon; not today.
Make porridge. Make coffee. Eat porridge. Drink coffee. Think for a bit. A new swim cap will make me feel better. Yes, there's a shiny new one still in its box at the back of the cupboard. Find towel. Put on trunks under jeans. Put bobble hat on.
Leave house. Go for a takeaway coffee as further stalling tactic. Drive to Lido. Check email on phone very thoroughly before getting out of car as final stalling tactic.
At poolside, remove bobble hat, put on new swimcap, replace bobble hat over top. There are three ladies cruising up and down as if in the Med. One of them is now wallowing in the shallow end, nibbling on a Cornetto.
I am shamed into action. Flip flops off, jeans off, goggles on, no sense in delaying further because the water temp is actually warmer than the air temp.
Then something strange happens. I jump in, and suddenly all is well. It's cold, but it's also, you know... cool. Tingly skin. Numb nose. As I surface, I can see my breath in the air. I'm properly awake now. What was the fuss about? This is fun!
Deep breath, first stroke, begin.